robbykim:

Sleeping Bear Dunes.

One of America’s best kept secrets.

jsphntan:

this looks…. wow. 

1. I’m in the same ENGR 100 class as Ian and David!  Actually this happened last semester too, except Ian never went and David always slept.
2. Give Us Rest by David Crowder Band
3. Cathy talking stuff over with me after I had some doubts after Saturday of the revival.
4. Tuesday 1/17- I’m blessed that Panchero’s exists.  I was blessed by today’s life group too.
5. Blessed by the revival meeting and ODF- they have been challenging and definitely perspective-changing.  Also blessed by Katie giving me rides all week haha
6. Wednesday 1/18 Had the pleasure of eating sushi with Undefeated brothers!
7. Thursday 1/19 Lots of things today- freshman dinner with more people than ever before!  Free-form prayer gathering!  Pastor Seth + Overdrive meeting!  Also invisible bus appearing at just the right moment for us north people!
8. Friday 1/20 Zach shared his testimony during LCG!
9. Saturday 1/21 Prayer walk and Pizza House!
10. Sunday 1/22 Men’s Ministry, dinner w/ Chris and All In Blessing!
11. Friday 1/27 Missed Access because my dad was in the hospital, but afterwards Undefeated came to our house and prayed for us
12. Saturday 1/28 Tons of people bringing food to our house
13. Sunday 1/29 Thank God there was a makeup Experiencing Ministry class
14. Tuesday 1/31 Met up with Mee Sun for lunch, then baked YUGIOH BROWNIES for John’s birthday!!!!!
15. After life group on Tuesday^ was encouraged again by my mom when she told me about how dad found out that one of the doctors has been keeping track of dad’s status and praying for him all this past week.
16. Wednesday 2/1 Men’s ministry with Chris and Brent… even though Brent and I were both super late haha.
17. 2/2 Got into North Quad for next year!  It’s expensive but my parents are ok with it!
18. 2/3 Access Out was *really* *really* awesome.  Brent and Esther organized a creative and fun game, and we had life group sit around and talk time afterwards =)
19. 2/8 Men’s ministry was awesome as always, and we ate together afterwards!
20. 2/10 So apparently Docs is the intense stay up all night team?  More challenges ahead, but maybe an opportunity to move on from work? hehe
21. 2/10 LCG bible study time with Zach today!
22. 2/11 Our LG went to Detroit today, to prayer walk around Detroit and visit an exhibition of Rembrandt (a painter) who painted lots of images of Christ.  Really cool.
23. 2/12 Chill time with Stephen and Chris and his roommates making cards for the girls
24. My product proposal turned out to be something I actually enjoyed writing! Usually I hate it.  God eased my pain.. haha
25. 2/14 #1 Today was like the best day.  Tuesdays are always really good.  Morning prayer!  Even though I woke up at 6:24.. still made it and got to pray with LG =).
26. 2/14 #2 Ate breakfast with Jon (Jet) and Woori!  I totally didn’t know NQ had breakfast until… 3 days ago.  Thank God, I was starving
27. 2/14 #3 Making chocolate covered strawberries and raspberries and pretzels with Michael was the most fun I’ve had in a while.  https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=10150672208322650&set=a.10150319672302650.392888.692037649&type=1
28. I thought I was gonna have to pull an all nighter but no math hw this week!!!!!!!!! YESSS
29. For the longest time I was pissed at my phone because the app that I paid for skipped when it played music, and I didn’t want to buy another app.  But today I opened my phone and I found the paid version of another app sitting there!  Did I get it free sometime…?  Either way God eased my pain.. haha
30. 2/15 Life group yesterday and men’s ministry today were both AWESOME.  Feeling sooo joyful.
31. Freshman hangout after Access!!!  After this we were blessed by another invisible bus at 3 AM
32. 2/18 MT appreciation- Even though at this point I still haven’t gone to a single meeting…(because of multiple legitimate reasons, of course), it was cool to see all the teams gathered together and learn about what they do!
33. 2/20 So I quit my job because of a conflict with Docs, but it takes 2 weeks to be relieved of responsibility, unless you find people to fill your shifts.  Usually it’s impossible to find people on Monday, so even thought I posted a substitution request I went in anyway because I was sure nobody would take the sub… but someone did!  Because of this I get to go to my first Docs meeting ever!!!!!!!!!!!!!
34. 2/22 Kinda got owned by 2 exams today.  Humbled, realizing that especially in this field I’m not gonna be the smartest most of the time.
35. 2/24 Men’s ministry in the morning.  I was late, but it was still good- Thanks Brent for always asking the hard questions.
36. Also today was Access Out!!  We went to a pizza place and bowling. Team Katie + remedy were legit! O.O
37. 2/25 I spent saturday mostly working with Hong Yoon on a Docs video.  First Docs experience!
38. I really enjoyed just sitting at home for 4 days and programming for hours while listening to music during break.
39. 3/2 This was my dad’s 50th birthday, which is also Zach’s dad’s 50th birthday!  Wow!  Unfortunately my mom and dad had gone to the hospital because my dad’s white blood cell count was so low.  We didn’t have time to celebrate, really, but a bunch of people from my home church made a scrapbook for him and a bunch of other cards, emails, and cakes, which was really touching.
40. 3/2-3/3  Seriously the best 2 days I’ve had in a while.  Felt like I spent a whole weekend with Undefeated.  We stayed over in Troy, served together, and ran around Detroit together.  A lot of life stories that were shared were really eye opening for me, and I definitely feel way closer to my Undefeated brothers and sisters =)))).
41. https://twitter.com/#!/mrsaturn101/status/176819216991797248
42. 3/6 Usually I don’t do anything special for my birthday, so going to get free food (bagels in the morning, bubble and pizza house at night) with Undefeated was really cool.  Even though I was feeling weird that day, I was really thankful for all the people God has brought into my life this year.
43. 3/8 PROVIDENCE DAY.  I have a few of these per semester, where I sleep really late the day before an exam or a presentation, and if not for God’s grace in waking me up like 10 minutes before, I definitely would have failed a few classes.  These are a constant reminder of God’s maintaining power, and how much I need Him.  This time I had a presentation at 12:30, and I woke up at 12:10.  This was the fastest I had ever put on a suit in my life. 
44. Also 3/8 It was super fun working with Ian, Phil and Sugy on EECS 280.  Grateful that God provides friends, because on my own I take forever to make any.
45. 3/9 Class night!  It’s always cool to see all of Overdrive together, because it happens so rarely!  haha….  
46. I’m glad for our little EECS 280 groups that has developed.  Fun times testing and programming.
47. 3/14- After studying there was a random Undefeated meet up.  We took pictures and did nothing for like 2 hours.  haha.
48. 3/15- Thankful for my bro Ian
49. 3/16- My friend Jonghwan from NWU came to visit.
50. 3/16- So we had a game night for ACCESS out, and a lot of people actually came!  Yay!  Also Dominion is amazing.
51. 3/17- Introduced Phil to No Thai, and ended up hanging out with Overdrive for an hour or so.
52. 3/18 HUGE Overdrive study party.  Too much of a party though.. haha.  Ended up going to Dude after a while, and had a good late night convo with David
53. 3/20 Good lunch with Chris.  Good to talk about some junk and weird stuff that happened this past week.
54. 3/21 Perfect weather!  Men’s ministry outside- saw a bunch of random people.
55. 3/22- Hardcore divine rebuke.  Super irritated with my project in general, but was able to make a small victory, ptl.  Prayer gathering was powerful and refreshing, a respite from depression.
56. 3/23- Bummed that I missed most of a powerful Access.  Still blessed to be able to spend a bit of time praying after rehearsal.
57. 3/24- Practice time with Overdrive!
58. 3/25- Our Pops concert ended up really well! Family couldn’t make it, but Undefeated was =).
59. 3/26- All nighter day, but at the Docs meeting God gave me a clear mind and strength for the night
60. 3/27- Hong Yoon gave me a ride north after MP so I could take a nap.  Phew.. was dying.
61. 3/28- Honest talk time with Brent and Chris, then more honest talk time with Chris.  Thankful for him.
62. 3/30- Breakthrough on the project, thank God.
63. 3/31- DP day!  Was awesome!  Will remember Stephen’s TURBO mode for a while hopefully =P
64. 4/1- Haven’t eaten with Akio and James in a while.  A bit of casual talk with some overdrivers too!
65. Also 4/1- So glad to see our class coming together through these Grad night practices =D  Friends for life!
66. 4/3- Felt awake during MP for the first time in a few weeks.  Had the opportunity to lead LG prayer.. Despite my shortcomings God pulled me through.  Good discussions during LG, definitely made me think.  Got to chat with an old friend a little bit.
67. 4/4- Discouraged when a classmate wasn’t free for Easter, but encouraged when another asked about church!  Got to talk and share the gospel and my testimony.  PTL!
68. 4/5- Ceder meal was suuuper super fun!  So glad for my Undefeated family
69. 4/6- I know my heart’s not in the right place, but was still able to understand a bit more about the cost of Christ’s sacrifice.  Jesus truly loves us more than we can comprehend.
70. 4/7- Baptism is always awesome and joyful!!!  Plus dinner w/ Undefeated, and Overdrive class night practice afterwards.  I feel like I’m having more and more days of no work done b/c I’m spending more time with people.  Good or bad?
71. 4/8- Honestly, Easter was tough for me, what with all the running around and such.  However, beforehand, after sunrise, we were able to talk to a random taxi car driver, and pray for him!  He looked kinda tired before but after we prayed for him he was all smiling and stuff.  Cool!  We were definitely full of God’s love and joy.
72. 4/11- RAN FOUR MILES WITH CHRIS AND BEN.  WHAT THE.  Thankful for brothers, without them there was no way I could have not died.  lol.
73. 4/11- Also we finished our project today.  PTL we finished.  omg. ugh.
74. 4/12- Everything worked out in the end.
75. 4/13- Grad night!  I think our class presentation went well, as did all the other class’s!  Awesome to hear from so may big brothers and sisters.  Glad to see our class becoming more and more united too =D
76. 4/14- Good News!  DANG!
77. 4/15- Overdrive study party/mafia party!  Also adventures on the roof!!! God’s starting to give me a bigger heart for OD
78. 4/16- Docs dinner to close off the year.  So glad I got to meet and serve with these people!  Also talked with David JSA about Earthbound.  What a cool guy.
79. 4/17- Last official Life group!! =(
80. 4/18- As Zach and I were putting finishing touches on our cheesecake he commented on how he was going to miss Life Group.  So true.  Gonna miss Undefeated sooooooo much ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
    Yeah today was our last get together thing at Katie’s place (Dyon’s old place/Latitude old meeting place wow).  Food was amazing, realized again how much I love these people.  It only hit me at the end, when we were walking out, that it was over.
81. 4/19- As a result of ^ I totally under-studied for my Calc 4 exam at 8AM. Woohoo! Hooray for God’s grace!
82. 4/19- Final study session at East Hall!  Miss this place.
83. 4/20- We made a video for Sunghyun for her birthday today.  Reminded of how much of a blessing she was first semester.
84. 4/20- HAHAHAHA divine intervention during my chinese exam lol
85. 4/20- Had nothing to do after my exams, luckily got to go see Hunger Games with Janice, Andre, Viroot, and Chris.  Wow GA people are so nerdy and cool hahaha
86. 4/21- Lunch with Chris, study study study with Overdrive!
87. 4/22- Finished up our Men’s ministry together by praying for each class.  Makes me excited for spring/summer life groups
88. 4/22- Got to pray with some of my NQ neighbors for next year.  Good perspective change from listening to Darma and Erica- neither he who plants nor he who waters is anything, but God who makes it grow.  God’s work will be done, and we should trust Him whether we see fruit or not.
89. 4/23- EECS 280 exam wasn’t tooooo bad.  Ate lunch with Ian afterwards and then it was Dominion/Video game time woohoo
90. 4/24 wow so much today.  Lunch meetup with an old friend.  Good to catch up.
91. 4/24 Had an awesome dinner with Brent!  He’s very genuine and blunt, no fluff.  Very thankful that i got to get to know this brother.
92. 4/24 Blessed to be a blessing- I am blessed to live in Ann Arbor with all the conveniences of not having to travel far to get home.  Realized this as I was helping David move out.  Thanks for being a great suitemate and brother, buddy!
93. 4/24-25 BDubs with Overdrive!  More and more God is teaching me to love this class =)
94. 4/25 Early morning- Fellowship time with Overdrive omg omg
95. 4/25 Early morning(3-5 AM)- More moving stuff/bro time with Justin and David.  We will remember times like this haha!
96. 4/25-4/26 Today, I went to play Dominion with Michael, Zach, Chris, and his roommates.  We ended up playing with Thieves and only 1 deck-cycling card(market).  Slowwest game everrrrrr.  Zach would cycle through his deck and end up with like 4 money.  LOL.
97. I think this should count as two.  Afterwards, I got to help out Aaron with laundry quarters, then went to Pancheros with Michael.  We got take out because the place literally filled up with drunk people the moment we got our food.  We went to an empty study room in Couzens(where we had LG a few times), ate Pancheros, then laid on the floor and talked about our feelings.  Good times =)
98. 4/27 (I’m skipping here..)Hopefully the first of many Overdrive cook dinners woohoo!  
99. 4/28 Connie and the guyzzz time.  Also.. do you sweat?  No I don’t do that stuff.
100. #100 should probably be a summary right?  So I’ll say, praise God, and thank you Undefeated and thank you Overdrive =)

That will probably drop to the way side (wayside?)

LEARN TO COOK

PICK PIANO BACK UP

EXERCISE MORE

LEARN EVERYTHING ABOUT CS

LEARN GUITAR

LEARN AFTER EFFECTS

READ SYSTEMATIC THEOLOGY

WATCH MORE MOVIES

WATCH MORE TV

dress better?

read the bible? (all of it?)

learn to shave with a non-electric thing?

I think this is turning into a things-I-want-to-do-in-life list

Learn to beatbox

Practice freestyle rap

Replay Earthbound

I think this will be a landmark in my life story.

Today I got around to making an expense report of my first year in college, because my dad and I both knew that I had spent WAY too much money.  So I collected my credit card and bank account statements and made a spreadsheet, and sent it to my dad.  Grand total:  Way too much.  Even with my parents giving me money, and the money I earned working this year, I still ran a large deficit, so my parents and I had a little talk.

I think after this year I’ve definitely realized that I am fairly loose with my money.  Not in the sense that I like wasting it by burning bills or blowing my nose with twenties or whatever, but in the sense that it doesn’t take much for me to pull the trigger on buying something I want.  So my dad told me, bluntly, that I needed to cut down, and learn to save, and I agreed to try my best and also pray for God to help me change my habits.

Probably because of both the “vulnerability training” I’ve received this year and because of the Holy Spirit, I went on from there to also share some of what I had realized about myself this year- that because I know that our family is relatively stable financially, and because I get cheap in-state tuition, I don’t feel the consequence of spending money a lot of the time.  My dad said that this matched what he had seen of me growing up- that I asked for my parents to spend money on me way more than my siblings.  Then he mentioned one specific instance- when one time I was pushing hard for my parents to buy something (probably in high school or something), and I said that I was entitled, because of my grades and other ability compared to others my age and compared to my siblings.

This shocked me, and it was one of the rare times when I *truly* *truly* realized that I’m messed up, royally.  But the sad thing is that I still think like that, sometimes a lot.  But that isn’t Christianity.  Christianity is that the entirety of the human race is screwed up, possesses nothing, and deserves hell, and that God, out of both His love and justice, not only saved us, but raised us up to be in a place that is the direct opposite of what we deserve.

The rest of what my parents said definitely cut to my heart, and it was a much-needed rebuke.  I’ll try to remember as much as I can:

My parents were proud too, as I suppose PhDs are wont to be.  When they were young they worked very very hard to be good Christians.  I remember many many times as a child when I would get to sleep late because my parents were counseling other people and other couples.  Sometimes they would bring food to other people’s houses and talk to them there.  

My mom said that back then she could objectively say that they were “higher” or “better” than a lot of the people at their church- not even out of pride, but that they knew that people (I’m trying to find a good way of saying this without saying “jealous”) wanted to be where they were, let’s say.  My parents had money, and kids, and a house.  They had a relatively very un-rocky relationship with each other.  Maybe because of their academic background, they had a lot knowledge about the bible, and were able to understand it better or more deeply than other people.  People thought my parents were even blessed in how they looked- their physical appearances.

My dad said that back then he thought he deserved it, because of how hard he worked to be good.  He was a deacon, he counciled people like I mentioned above, and he spent soooo much time preparing to teach adult Sunday school each week, and was often lauded and praised for it, and people told him how much it helped them grow and how much they didn’t realize before.  The same kind of praise came recently when our church was in the middle of looking for a pastor and so my dad and several others took turns preaching on Sunday.

Then the breaking came- I think first with the rounds after rounds of layoffs (during the economy crash) that my dad survived, but more climatically with his cancer.  When my dad was first scanned, and they found an unknown lump in his back and the doctors were saying that he needed surgery, my parents were considering whether or not to tell the congregation.  They didn’t want to be a burden, yes, but deeper inside they didn’t want to be seen as weak and in need of help.  But because they knew people would find out anyway, they agreed to ask a friend to send out an email just saying that my dad “had a back problem, and needed surgery”.

More scan results came back, this time indicating that there were multiple masses, making the doctors think that it was cancer, and that it was a bad kind (this is not what my dad actually has), one that had a 40% survival rate after 5 years.

My dad described this as a death sentence.  At the time neither of my parents could say anything, until my mom asked again if the congregation should be told.  My dad thought about it for a long while, because he still- STILL- had pride.  But he realized his situation: that his life was on the line, and even with all the help my parents had given people over the years, even with all the service, and even though my dad was the one getting up in front to preach to instruct our entire church, at that moment they realized that they had nothing, and that they needed help.

The congregation’s response was to flood our family with prayer, with food, with cards, with words of encouragement, and anything they could do to help.  My parents, who were once the ones always giving help to others because they were too prideful to receive it from anyone else, were now on the receiving end, being held up not by themselves, but by God’s grace and love flowing through their friends.  And maybe for the first time, they realized that this is grace- that even when they have nothing and aren’t even able to help themselves, they receive blessings that they know aren’t from their own work or merit, but from God.

When people found out, someone told my dad that he was the last person they would expect to get this disease, because he was so “holy” or whatever.  But good things don’t always happen to good people.  No, scratch that, good things *always* happen to people who love God, who is the only One who is good.  Because through this my parents were and are being broken, and they told me that they know, at the end, they will be able to say that it was worth it.

I’ll end with this, the conclusion of the matter if you will.  The last thing my dad said to me before they prayed for me was about the Christian walk.  The Christian walk is not about slowly climbing up some spiritual mountain so that we can become like God.  Yes, God anoints us for great things- we are called sons of God, heirs to the throne.  David was anointed to to be king.  Joseph received a dream that he would reign over his family.  Jesus is God before the beginning of time.  But the path that they took- and the path that we all must take, is downward- to humility, to persecution, to becoming a slave and a prisoner, to being crucified on a cross.  Then in the end, it will be God who will raise us up so that we will fulfill our calling that He gave us.  All glory be to God, forever and ever!

If you ask some of the leaders at HMCC if Life Groups and LCGs and stuff like that are determined randomly they’ll probably answer that “nothing is random”.  Which is kind of at odds with my experience of being placed into a Life Group because the first time I walked in to a Sunday Celebration, it was the day that the new Life Groups were going to have their first dinner kickoff meeting thing.  I came in at 9:15 ish because based on the bus schedule it was either that or 9:45, and I didn’t know there were shuttles.  Being the person I was at the time, I naturally went to sit on one of the blue chairs in the corner because nobody was there yet.  And being the super-welcoming-and-friendly person that she was, Katie came up to me and started to talk to me, and asked if I had joined a Life Group yet.  I hadn’t, so I filled out a card and gave it to her, and seriously like 30 seconds later she came back and told me “actually you’ll be in my life group”.

All that to say- as random as it seemed to me on that Sunday, it wasn’t random!  Because God knew what He was doing, when He put me with all you fine folk, and when He poured down His love so that we could all love one another.  It was in October ish when I realized, (quoting Zach) “I really like[love](sic) these people.  I don’t know why.”

I really want to thank you all, and thank God.  I came in to church thinking I was super cool because I was there at some quote-on-quote pivotal moments in this church, but God has used you guys to teach me that it’s not about me, and that living to love and serve God and others is better than anything else I could have imagined.  I thought I was someone who just naturally didn’t need people, but God gave me a family that will be hard to live without.  I think one thing I will remember for a long time is when, after I came home from waiting with my mom while my dad’s surgery was going on, you all came over to my house after Access and prayed for us.  At grad night, one thing that was repeated over and over was “I didn’t deserve any of it”, and looking back on this year, I definitely didn’t deserve all the love I received from the church and from you guys, and I’m grateful that you all reached out to me and accepted me.

I have a tendency whenever I get comfortable to want things to never change, but I know God has even greater things in all of our futures.  And this might be way out there to think about, but we’ll all be together in heaven right?  So it’s not like we’re separating forever! *sniff*

So anyway

Thank you Michael, Zach, John, Sammy, Sulamita, Lexa, Rebecca, Phil, Stephen, Seth, Brent, Michelle, Mengqi, Armenthia, Paula, Sunghyun, Christie, Tushar, Esther, Meesun, Daniel, Jeremiah, Luke, David, Katie, Cathy, and Chris.

Thank you thank you thank you, I love you all!

jrheee:

Story of all of the Overdrive members’ lives

LOL

I feel stuck.  Everything I do I seem to be doing wrong.

I look at some of the “elders” of our church- people in the fronthouse, people leading Life groups, people on stage- and I say in my heart that I want to be like them.  Why?  Because I want to be looked up to, and to have the perfectly secure life I think they all have.

I look at some of my peers and I say in my heart that I’m going to be better than you.  I’m going to out-spiritual you, and out-dedicate you.  I’m going to get to the point where I don’t need your approval.

I look at some of my friends that aren’t from church.  Some of them I say are hopeless.  Others, I say that they aren’t really Christians, they just say so on their profile pages.  Look at the way you talk.  You don’t love God.

So I’m sorry, because if I know you I’ve probably thought something like this about you at some point.  Especially my Overdrive brothers and sisters, and especially that second point.  Sorry sorry sorry.

And there’s no way out on my own,  because none of us can change what we feel or think.  Maybe by brainwashing ourselves, but that isn’t real and it doesn’t last.

Create in me a clean heart, oh God!  Renew a right spirit within me!

nananaaa:

First sem of Eng AP, in a nutshell.